We all have things or situations that we’re a little scared of. Mine seem to go through phases. At one point the dentist, then flying, then the dentist again,...
For some reason, there’s an unspoken rule that by the time you hit your twenties you should know what you’re doing with your life. This is not true. No one knows what they’re doing in their twenties, you just think they do. Ever seen a friend on social media and thought ‘damn their life’s perfect’. Well let me tell you something; social media is like a great big colander, it catches all the shit and only lets through the good bits.
Things are never as good as they seem and sometimes we all just need to take a step back and reassess the gap between what we’re doing and what we think we should be doing.
Here are 6 reasons why it’s perfectly okay to not have a clue what you’re doing in your twenties.
This almost seems too obvious to say but seriously, if you’re still in your twenties you are young. And being young makes it perfectly acceptable to make mistakes, change your mind a hundred times and get into the debt that you’ll spend your thirties paying off. In your twenties, you’re still young enough to let your parents bail you out, but you’re not so stupid that you’ll make the same mistakes twice. In your mid-twenties, you can choose to ‘settle down’, but there’s no biological clock ticking in your ear if you don’t. When you think about it, you’re twenties are actually a pretty sweet place to be.
Ever returned to a bad ex boyfriend, against the advice of everyone around you? It doesn’t matter how many times we’re told, the reasoning and decision making has to be our own. How many students have blown their entire student loan in fresher’s week and spent the next semester living off of noodles? Even if someone had told them the outcome beforehand, would they have listened? We need to make mistakes to realise who we are and what we will accept. And that’s okay. Our mistakes are what lift us off a bad road onto a better one.
The country may just about have it’s head above water but the truth is, it’s still in pretty dire constraints. As part of ‘generation rent’ the sad truth is that you will struggle to get a mortgage or any kind of real estate, upwards of your Russell and Bromley loafers, in your pre-thirties. All the more reason to take your time and find out what you really want to do with your life. Because if you can’t be rich, at least you’ll be happy.
Some of the hardest lessons you’ll learn in your twenties are that the people you trust, admire and love may not always be what they seem. The childhood friend you thought would always be there? Backstabber. The cool, older Cousin you put on a pedestal? Lazy sponger. Unfortunately, it takes a decade or two to see some people’s true colours and also to learn what you’re prepared to put up with and what you aren’t. This can be a hard realisation at any age, but put it this way; at least you won’t have to photoshop anyone out of your wedding photos.
How can you plan for the rest of your life when you don’t even know who you’ll be or what you’ll want in 10 years time? If you’d spoken to me ten years ago, I’d have swapped my life savings for some dodgy hair extensions. Be open to change; move careers, live in a new City. The ones who get their lives nailed down at twenty usually have the most issues at 40. Enjoy not knowing what may come, it could end up being better than anything you might have planned.
If there’s a time to be selfish, this is it. It’s okay to not know where you’re going in life, because the only person relying on you, is you. Assuming you’re childless, mortgageless and reasonably self-dependant, you have the opportunity to be whatever you want and to go, wherever you want. Your age isn’t driving the bus, you are. Now is the time to make completely selfish decisions for your own, innate pleasure. Now doesn’t that feel good?
Beth is a Writer and Digital Marketer who founded The Full Agenda as a place to talk about the things that kept her and her friends up at night. Currently working as a Marketing consultant to various SMEs she is a big fan of the startup market and loves technology, apps and anything social media related. When not obsessively checking Google Analytics, she can be found reading, writing or relaxing with a glass of Prosecco.
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